There are two versions of this job ad. This is the vapid version for insomniacs. For a more lighthearted read, head over to MongooseJobs dotcom.

• The Lead Developer will work for an ambitious software scale-up in Central London.
• The Lead Developer will earn £75,000 per annum.
• The Lead Developer will enjoy hybrid working on a 3+2 basis.
• The Lead Developer will write efficient and scalable code.
• The Lead Developer will be experienced with PHP (Laravel / Lumen), Javascript and Typescript.
• The Lead Developer will be familiar with React and Python.
• The Lead Developer will enjoy interrogating databases (MySQL).
• The Lead Developer will ensure robust AWS integrations and workflows.
• The Lead Developer will coach and mentor a small team of engineers.
• The Lead Developer will be a champion for new technologies and best practice.
• The Lead Developer will foster a culture of software delivery excellence.
• The Lead Developer will work closely with senior business stakeholders on deliverables.
• The Lead Developer will be the first point of contact for all functional and technical queries.
• The Lead Developer will showcase excellent communication and project management skills.
• The Lead Developer will design and implement tactical and strategic fixes.
• The Lead Developer will use Agile / Kanban to manage work streams.

Still with us? Great. Then please send us a CV and covering letter convincing us that you actually enjoyed reading this version. We look forward to hearing from you.